Funny scientific ways to catch a lion

Six scientific ways to catch a lion:

1. Newton's Method:
Let the lion catch you. For every action there is equal and opposite reaction. Implies you caught
lion.

2. Einstein Method:
Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion. Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will
also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.

3. Schrodinger Method:
At any given moment, there is a positive probability that lion to be in the cage. So set the trap, sit down and wait.

4. Inverse Transformation Method:
Place a spherical cage in the forest and enter it. Perform an inverse transformation with respect to lion. Lion is in and we are out.

5. Thermodynamic Procedure:
Construct a semi-permeable membrane which allows everything to pass it except lions. Then sweep the entire forest with it.

6. Integration Differential Method:
Integrate the forest over the entire area. The lion is some where in the result. So differentiate the result PARTIALLY w.r.t lion to trace out the lion.


GOT FRUSTRATED?!....
now lets kill the lion...

Govinda method:
Continously dance before the lion for 5-6 days.

Rahul Dravid method:
Ask the lion to bowl at u.U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run.

Menaka Gandhi method:
Save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continously.

George Bush method:
Link the lion with Osama Bin Laden and shoot him.

Delhi Police method:
Catch mouse, beat him till he admits he is the Lion, then kill him!

Funny - Basic definitions - About Engineers

Some Basic definitions..

Engineering College : Place where you're punished for getting good HSC marks.

Senior : Guy who got ragged as junior and wanna get some payback...

Fresher : Guy who has to ask where the canteen is...

Really Dumb Fresher : Guy who asks a senior where the canteen is.

Really Really Dumb fresher : Guy who follows the senior to the canteen.

Ragging : The unfortunate fate of the previous idiot.

Evasive action : Watch the juniors when any seniors come nearby. (No one runs faster than a fresher. NO ONE.)

Lectures : Waste of time. Physical presence is a must...only meant for sleeping, completing assignments & general TP

Tuitions : What you take when you don't waste enough time....

Professor : Person paid to put students to sleep.

Vernacular Prof : Unusual variant of previous individual who comes packaged with his own brand of English ("Now you check me our journal." "You Out get from class." "Are you Understand, Beta?" )

Practicals : 60 to 90 minutes in which we watch the girls do our experiment, and usually destroy a considerable array of lab equipment.

Hopeless Practical : The practical in which there are no girls in our group simply look blankly at each other, fiddle with the equipment, and finally copy the readings.(from the girls of course...).

The Truth about exams....


Irony : The guy who copied your entire paper passes and you flunk.

Critical Calculation : Summing up the marks you attempted worth in the exam...

Re-verification : A cruel joke. (results of which come after you give the KT exam).

An engineer's 10 engineering commandments of Life

1. Thou shall study only during the preparatory leave.

2. Thou shall never write thy assignments thyself.

3. Thou shall begin writing thy journals only on the morning of submission.

4. Thou shall treat all marks above 40 as bonus.

5. Thou shall have at least 70 per cent attendance in the canteen.

6. Thou shall pass GRACEfully.

7. Thou shall always be an OUTstanding student.

8. Thou shall give thy attendance without being present...PROXY is a MUST

9. If thou can't convince them , confuse them.

10. Thou shall start every sentence with a four-lettered word.

The Years of Engineering

F.E. Fond of Engineering
S.E . Sick Of Engineering
T.E. Tired of Engineering
B.E. Balls to Engineering

Engineers Anthem:

Hum Honge All Clear, Honge All Clear, Honge All Clear Ek Din, OH-HO, Mann me hai vishwas, pura hai vishwas, hum honge all clear ek din

Top two Engineering Rumors:

'Did you hear the results are being put up today at 5:30pm'

'Did you hear the exams are postponed by two weeks, its been put up at VJTI'

The most dreaded acronym for Engineers:

ATKT ( After Trying Keep Trying)

The most important criteria while selecting an engineering college:

Girl to Boy ratio ( if more than0 .025% then that college is engineers dream come true)

Engineers at work:

Assignments solved by one and then carrying out mass transfer operations throughout the class

The most important machine for Engineers:

Xerox Machine (Without which assignment completion wouldn't be possible)

The most important table in an Engineer's House:

The glass table ( to carry out GT operations, during Night Duty.)

The only queue an Engineer is familiar with:

Submission Queue

An Engineer's favourite watch:

Bird Watch !

Common Engineering Dialogues after a paper:

'What is this yaar, more than 70% of the paper was out of the syllabus'

'This was the worst paper set in the entire engineering history'

'I am failing....I got screwed royally'

Feeling after Completing Engineering:

Survived Engineering !!!!!!!!!!!

Funny-Biscuit Manufacturer writes a love letter to his Girl Friend??

Dear Mari e

Yesterday was a Good Day . Our meeting was Truly Nice .. Though

I was in 50 - 50 mind to see you, the meeting and the Treat were good.

The Hide and Seek game we had played was really memorable. If I had

not met you, probably my Little Heart would have burst. But this

occasion gave me a great Boost to make me feel like seeing you again

and again. Like a Tiger I will grab you if anybody comes between us.


Yours,

Bourbon

SOFTWARE ENGINEER`S LOVE LETTER

SOFTWARE ENGINEER`S LOVE LETTER

Hi gud morning

Sweetheart,

I`ve seen you yesterday while surfing on the local train platform and realized that you are the only site I was browsing for. For a long time I`ve been lonely; this has been the bug in my life and you can be a real debugger for me now.

My life is an uncompiled program without you, which never produces an executable code and hence is useless.

You are not only beautiful by face but all your ActiveX controls are attractive as well.

Your smile is so delightful; it encourages me and gives me power equal to thousands of mainframes processing power.

When you looked at me last evening, I felt like all my program modules are running smoothly and giving expected results. /*which I never experienced before.*/

With this letter, I just want to convey to you that if we are linked together, I'll provide you all objects & libraries necessary for a human being to live an error free life.

Also don`t bother about the firewall which may be created by our parents as I've strong hacking capabilities by which I`ll ultimately break their security passwords and make them agree for our marriage.

I anticipate that nobody has already logged in to your database so that my connect script will fail.

And it's all but certain that if

this happened to me, my system will crash beyond recovery.

Kindly interpret this letter properly and grant me all privileges of your inbox. Error free...

Yours Only
void main()

Which One Love Marriage or Arranged Marriage

Which One Will You Go For??

Love Marriage	Arranged Marriage
Resembles procedural programming language. We have some set functions like flirting, going to movies together, making long conversations on phone and then try to fit all functions to the candidate we like.	Similar to object oriented programming approach. We first fix the candidate and then try to implement functions on her. The functions are added to supplement the main program. The functions can be added or deleted.
It is a throwaway type of prototype as client requirements rises with time thus it is a dynamic system and difficult to maintain.	Requirements are well defined so use of waterfall model is possible
Family system hangs because hardware (called parents) is not responding.	Compatible with hardware ( Parents).
You are the project leader so u are responsible for implementation and execution of PROJECT- married life.	You are a team member under project leader (parents) so they are responsible for successful execution of project Married life.
Client expectations include exciting feature as spouse cooking food, washing clothes etc.	All these features are covered in the SRS as required features.
Acceptance test possible you can try before you Buy.	Product is sold on an as is where is basis. Product once sold will not be taken back!
Love Marriage is like Windows , beautiful n seductive.... Yet one never knows when it will crash....	Arranged Marriage is like Unix ... boring n colorless... still extremely reliable n robust.

"A true friend is someone who reaches

your hand and touches your heart..."

Keep Smiling

HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY

well after reading mum'' mirror i'm br'gng fwd my conclusion abt

---

HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY.......

It's really not difficult...
To make a woman happy; a man only needs to be :
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
17. a psychologist
18. a pest exterminator
19. a psychiatrist
20. a healer
20. a good listener
22. an organizer
23. a good father
24. very clean
25. sympathetic
26. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
44. give her compliments regularly
45. love shopping
46. be honest
47. be very rich
48. not stress her out
49. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
50. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
51. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
52. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
53. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes
-------------------------------------------------------
<>

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY:
1 . Leave him in peace

SOME USEFUL DEFINITIONS:Cigarette,Love affairs,Ecstasy,Computer Engineer

SOME USEFUL DEFINITIONS:

1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.

2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.

3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage

5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".

6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ...

9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.

10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

11. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

12. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.

13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

15. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

16. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

18. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

20. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

21. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

22. Opportunist : A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

23. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."

24. Pessimist : A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.

25. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

26. Father : A banker provided by nature.

27. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.

28. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

29. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

30. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

31. Computer Engineer : One who gets paid for reading such mails...

Sholay in IT - IT ke Sholay

Sholay in IT..............

Gabbar sends Kaalia and two others to Ramgad to collect the loot-maar software he had ordered. They reach Ramgad and started shouting: "Abe O thakur! Kahan hai woh loot-maar software? Last date to kab ka nikal gaya ". Thakur [with anger]: "Chillao mat! jaakar Gabbar se kah do ki Thakur Software walon ne paagal kutton ke liye software banana bund kar diya hai." Kaalia: "Bahoot garmi dikha rahe ho thakur? Koi naye programmers hire kiye hain kya?" Thakur: "Nazar uttha ke dekh, Kaalia, tere sar par powerbuilder chal raha hai." Kaalia looks up and sees Viru (Dharmendra) working on a PC on one Water tank and Jay (Amitabh) on another, using a laptop. Kaalia Starts Laughing and says: "Ha ha... thakur ne freshers ko liya hai, Ye log Programming karenge? In ko to DOS commands bhi nahin aate." Veeru shouts: "Chup-chaap chala ja kutte. Hum log consultants hain, Kuch bhi kar sakte hain." Jay hits his keyboard,then says: "jaao kaalia, Gabbar se kahna ki uska server down ho gaya ."
AT GABBAR'S DEN... Gabbar: "Kitne bugs the?"
Kaalia: "Do sarkaar." Gabbar: "Wo do! Aur tum teen. Phir bhi fix nahi kar sake? Kya soch key aaye ho? Gabbar bahoot khush hoga? Naya assignment dega ...aur increment bhi? Iski saza milegi... barobar milegi." [Snatches an X terminal from Sambaa]. "Kitne sessions hain is machine mein?" Sambaa: "Chhey sarkaar." Gabbar: "Session chhey aur programmer teen. Bahoot naainsaafi hai ." [logout - logout - logout]. "Haan ab theek hai... ab tera kya hoga" Kaalia?" Kaalia: "Sarkaar, maine aapka code likha tha."
Gabbar: "To ab documentation kar! Ha...... Ha...... Ha...... Ha...... Ha...... Ha...... Ha.............................................

What will happen If INR 1 Rs = USD $ 100

(Copy + Paste + Send - Enjoy)

Year : 2050

Place : IBM , USA
(Two Americans Talking)

Currency Conversion Rate : INR 1 Rs = USD $ 100

Alex: Hi John, you didn't come yesterday to office?

John: Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for stamping.

Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that nowadays it has become very strict.

John: Yeah, but I managed to get it.

Alex: How long it took to get it stamped?

John: Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they played with him like anything. That's why it got delayed. I went there at 2 AM itself and waited and returned by 4 PM .

Alex: Really? In India , it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA

John: Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested in coming to USA man, their economy has been booming.

Alex: So, when are you leaving?

John: Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air-India. Sort of dream come true.

Alex: How long are you going to stay in India .

John: What do you mean by how long? I will be settled in India , my company has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta ..(green card)

Alex: Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara Patta in India .

John: Yeah, that's why, I am planning to marry an Indian girl there.

Alex: But you can find lots of US girls in Hyderabad , Bangalore and Mumbai.

John: But, I prefer Indian girls because they are beautiful and cultured.

Alex: Where did you get the offer, Hyderabad?

John: Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it is Rs. 2000/- for a single room accommodation.

Alex: I see, that's too much for US people, Rs.1/- =$100/-. Oh God! What about in Bangalore, Mumbai?

John: No idea, but it is less than what we have in Hyderabad. It is like the world headquarters of software

Alex: I heard, almost all the Indians are having one personal Robot for help.

John: You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for less than Rs.7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Ambassador, which costs Rs.2 ,00,000/- but has got a lovely design.

Alex: By the way, who is your client?

John: Subbarao and Apparao Associates, a pure Indian company, specialising in Embedded Software.

Alex: Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Indian company. They are really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened their Fly-by-night outfits in India . Indian companies pay you in full even when you are on bench.

My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Bihar, the most liveable place in India , probably world. There you have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I
wonder how that state has perfected that system.

John: Yeah man!, you are right. I hope our Americaalso follows their footsteps.

Alex: How are you going to cope with their language?

John: Why not? From my school days I have been learning Hindi as my first language here at New York . At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Hindi and were quite impressed by my cent per cent score in TOHIL i.e. Test of Hindi as International Language.

Alex: So, you are going to have fun there.

John: Yeah, I will be travelling in the world's fastest train, world's largest theme park, and the famous Bollywood where you can see actors like, Hrithik, Shah Rukh Khan and all. Esselworld is also near Bollywood.

Alex: You know, the PM is scheduled to visit US next year, he may then relax the number of visas.

John: That's true. Last month, Narayana Murthy visited White House and donated Rs. 2000/- for infrastructure development at aSiliconValleyand has promised more if we follow the model of High-
Tech City of Bangalore . Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.

Alex: But, Indian government is planning to split Narayanamurthy's Infosys.

John: He is a hard worker man, he can build any number of Infosys like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.

Alex: OK, Good Luck John.

John: Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a "Kurta Pyjama" because they will think you are too Indianised and may doubt you will never come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But don't forget to say " Namaste, aap kaise hai " to the Visa officer at Window 5. It seems he likes that and will not give you a visa if you don't greet him that way.

Something to make your day...

Something to make your day --))

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= ========= =======

Employees of a Company are all worried. Some are roaming around. Some are in
loud discussions during office time.....

Some Trainees, who had just joined, notice this and enquire about what happened
to a senior employee, they ask, "What's going on?"

"Terrorists have kidnapped our Boss"

They're asking for Rs.10 Crores ransom, otherwise they're going to
douse him with petrol and set him on fire.

We're going from desk to desk, taking up a collection."

One Trainee asks, "How much is everyone giving, on average?

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"About 1 litre."

MBA Vs. BE Student

Copy + Paste + Send njoy

MBA Vs. BE Student

This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a competition

organized in Britain and this joke was sent by an Indian......

A MBA and a BE student go on a camping trip, set up their tent ,and fell asleep.

Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend and says

"Look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."

The BE asks, "What does that tell you?"

The MBA ponders for a minute.

"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies

and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo .

Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and

we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

What does it tell you?"

The BE is silent for a moment, then speaks.

"Practically...Someone has stolen our tent".

" ENGINEERING = 100% COMMON SENSE "

Gujarati Funeral .

Subject: Gujarati Funeral



Gujarati Funeral .


A family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Ba)
arrived from the US . It was sent by one of the daughters.

The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid;
they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:
Dear Chandrakantbhai , Arvindbhai, Smitaben and Varsha ,

I am sending Ba's body to you, since it was her wish that she should be

Cremated in the compound of our ancestral home in GUJARAT.

Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed.

You will find inside the coffin, under Ba's body, cans of cheese, 10
packets Of Tobler chocolates and 8 packets of Badam (peanuts) please divide these among all of you.

On Ba's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan.

There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct.

Ba is wearing 6 Am erican T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan.
Just distribute the rest among yourselves.

The 2 new Jeans that Ba is wearing are for the boys.

The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on Ba's left wrist. Shanta masi, Ba is wearing the

necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her.

The 6 white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among my nephews.

Please distribute all these fairly.

Love Sumitaben.

Unspoken Communication

Unspoken Communication...Very Funny

Welcome to The Stock Market

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys
for Rs10/-.


The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching
them. The man bought hundreds at Rs10/- and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their
effort. He further announced that he would now buy at Rs20/-. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and
they started catching monkeys again. Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back
to their farms. The offer rate increased to Rs25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an
effort to even see a monkey let alone catch it.


The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at Rs50! However, since he had to go to the city on some
business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him. In the absence of the man, the assistant told the
villagers. Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at
Rs35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell it to him for Rs50." The villagers squeezed up
with all their savings to buy the monkeys. Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, only monkeys
everywhere!!
Welcome to The Stock Market !!!!!!!!

Story of a BOTTLE

A guy, sitting outside his home about to be evicted from his house, was contemplating how the future would be after he had divorced his wife, lost his children and lost his job.

He notices a crate of beer bottles and walks up to it.
He takes out an empty bottle, smashing it into the concrete wall swearing,
"You are the reason I don't have my wife", second bottle, "You are the reason I don't have my children", third bottle "You are the reason I lost my job".

He notices the fourth bottle is sealed and still full of beer. He takes the bottle, puts it aside and says,

"Stand aside my dear friend; I know you were not involved".

Excessive Use of Technology

-::: Copy - Paste - Forward - Enjoy :::-

Excessive Use of Technology

KIDS....these kids....

KIDS

A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, 'Two plus
five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is
nine....'

His mother heard what he was saying and gasped,'What are you doing?'

The little boy answered, 'I'm doing my math homework, Mom.'

'And is this how your teacher taught you to do it?' the mother asked.

'Yes,' he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day,
'What are you teaching my son in math?'

The teacher replied, 'Right now, we are learning addition.'

The mother asked, 'And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son
of a bitch is four?'

After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, 'What I taught them was,
two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four.'

Before Marriage & After Marriage

Before Marriage
He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course! Over and over!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why are you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Every chance I get!

She: Will you hit me?

He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.

She: Darling!

After marriage... Simply read from bottom to top.


Enjoy madi…

A Tomato Story...

A Jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy' at Microsoft. The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test.

'You are employed' he said. Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may start.

The man replied 'But I don't have a computer, neither an email'.

'I'm sorry', said the HR manager. If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job.'

The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only $10 in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10Kg tomato crate.
He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In less than two hours, he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with $60.

The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go everyday earlier, and return late. Thus, his money doubled or tripled everyday.

Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, and then he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.

5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food retailers in the US ...
He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance.
He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan.
When the conversation was concluded the broker asked him his email. The man replied,'I don't have an email.'
The broker answered curiously, 'You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an e mail?!!' The man thought for a while and replied, 'Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!'

Moral(s) of the story
1. Internet is not the solution to your life.
2. If you don't have Internet, and work hard, you can be a millionaire.
3. If you received this message by email, you are closer to being a office boy/girl, than a millionaire. .........

George Bush goes to school...

George bush

George Bush goes to school to give a speech. After his talk he offers
question time.

One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is.


"Bob".


"And what is your question, Bob?"



"I have 3 questions.


First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?


Second, why are you President when Kerry got more votes?


And third, what happened to Osama Bin Laden?



Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that
they will continue after recess.



When they resume George says, "OK, where were we?


Oh that's right --- question time. Who has a question?"



A different little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him
what his name is. "Steve"


"And what is your question, Steve?"



"I have 5 questions.


First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?


Second, why are you President when Kerry got more votes?


Third, what happened to Osama Bin Laden?


Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?

And fifth, Where is "Bob"?